I didn't manage to wake up on time. I lay for a long time in the warmth undercovers. I was listening to the radio. Watching the time I'd set aside for the morning go away. I show such an undeniable aversion to beginning my day. I must have known something. I was the flower that did not open today. I never managed to be me. I didn't know what to do.

I didn't have enough time. It was like I needed to think everything through. I didn't know what I was going to do about breakfast. I wondered if I had enough time. There was nowhere to go except the McDonals drive-thru. I kept thinkingf about how the intercom service system never detects a motorcycle.

I didn't have any idea what the hell I wanted. I thought about buying cigarettes. I wished I wouldn't.

I have many times thought that the chatter in my head was the very best of my ideas spilling out a hole in me.

Tonight I took a laborer's bath. Sat up and dripped water over me with my fingers. I didn't mind the way it ran down my face. It was a soft tickling. And I liked the way the water looked like my tears in a stream.

I thought about the girl's I've ever loved, but for whom I was not able to summon the courage. Those for whom I was absent upon the day they encountered me. There's not enough water.

And I let my head hang real low in my shoulders. There it was finally. I kept breathing evenly and low. I didn't look at anything but the water. And my legs. My feet hurt so much I drew them under me and rubbed at them. I crossed my arms so my hands grasped their opposite feet. And it was like I'd closed a circuit on myself.

THE GRIFFITH PARK AND SILVERLAKE RAILROAD

I got the idea to write an opinion for the local resident’s association newsletter. I’d thought about doing something like this before. I figured I could contact the editor of the little two page community mailbox stuffer. I’d tell him I wanted to write a story about the old guy who lives next door. I saw a story that would tell something about all the years he’s lived in the area. I could mention his military service in World war II. But that idea just passed by. I remember getting as far as taking pictures of him one morning when we went to the swap meet together.
This time I think my idea is more interesting. I want to propose the creation of an inner-urbain rail/tram system for Silverlake and Los Feliz. I’ve got it all planned out. I was lying in the bathtub, massaging my hand that I tore open in the garage the other day. I was in such a relaxed state that I could imagine amazing possibilities. I decided I was going to build a little train system around the neigbourhood.
I see this railroad as a loop. The next thing I have to do is take a drive in my car, and set the odometer at the beginning of my proposed route. And then I just take a drive. Starting from the terminus I envision at the Vermont/Sunset redline stop, I motor leisurely around silverlake via fountain, Hyperion, Rowena, Glendale and Sunset boulevards. And then back to the redline station. This is an important first step. I will need to know the trackage, if I am to give reliable estimates of construction costs to the people of LA. Not to get ahead of myself. There are many other steps to take before we actually break ground. But I think the point I make about trackage is quite clear. If I’m going to get my day in front of the big men. And if I’m going to get to make my pitch, for my little railroad, then I’d better have accurate numbers on track-miles.
The drive around the area will assist me in planning this undertaking on many levels. I can start to take into account the possible impact on traffic flow my railroad would create around the area. And I’m seeing already that some automobiles are going to have to be displaced. For this railroad to work I will need raised trackways to ensure a clear right-of-way. If the trams just sit in traffic, then they won’t be any improvement over vehicle the congestion we suffer now. And no one is going to want to ride it.
So there will certainly be some engineering issues. There will have to be a tunnel which gets my trains to make the same platform stop as the Redline subway. I think the connection would only work if passengers could step off the redline trains, and get right onto the Silverlake and Griffith Park trams on the other side of the platform.
And along the route there will also have to be cuts, embankments, aerial caternary wiring from which the tram’s electric motors can draw current. There will be a need for pedestrian islands on which passengers can step safely onto and off of the cars. But that can all be worked out. I’m going to take serious notes when I drive the route. I can also look for spots to build a barn for the cars to be housed as well as a shop to service electric motors. I have some very interesting ideas for the construction of these utilitarian structures. I plan to submit photos I’ve taken of abandoned railroad buildings around California. I think those simple wooden dwellings would look smashing. But I’m open to others ideas! The mission style is also very nice, and appropriate to the area’s Spanish heritage.
The trams themselves I see being designed and built by area artists. We will have semi-open cars. The trams will have an open gallery on the stern, such as found on Parisian busses before the war. The mechanical stuff such as motors and wheels could be supplied from somewhere like China or Russia, where they still make relatively simple electric trams. We would just take delivery of the rolling chassis and build the coaches to suit. I think open-air Hollywood convertible cars would bring people from far and wide, just to take in the area from our breezy open trams.